Stealing sentences in between cutting it up.
This month: queer parenting and parasocial erotics with Krys Malcolm Belc
Yesterday I woke up to a text from a friend who reached out to report that they are so engrossed in their summer read that they arranged their kids’ activities in ways that facilitated more nose-in-book time for themself. YES! I endorse this parenting strategy.
Everyone talks about beach reads, but I think summer invites the opportunity for escapism without getting sand stuck between your toes. Especially for parents (and teachers) these weeks off from school offer a break from the typical routine, a temporary realignment, or as I like to reinterpret the Catholic framing: extraordinary time. There’s a beginning, an already-agreed-upon end, and with those constraints, the opportunity to make the most of the space in between.
I devoured this month's book club read, What I Made for Dinner, in between prepping meals for my daughter during our vacation home swap in Emeryville, CA. It was extra sweet to read intimate observations about someone else's kitchen while engaging in the most familiar domestic tasks I've done hundreds of times before — while in someone else's kitchen.
Krys' unconventional memoir is all at once a meditation on the specificity of queer parenting, the drudgery of child rearing, and the parasocial erotic power of watching food creators. In many ways, the parallels to my life are clear — transmasc dad frets over whether or not child rejects one’s care — but, in other ways we sit on opposite sides of the screen. I’ve spent the past 20+ years making content (films, tv, podcasts, marketing, etc.) with audiences in mind; Krys writes deeply about being the viewer, and in this Reel-era, the voyeur.
I can’t wait to break bread with Krys next Monday night. All the details below. Bring your fav recipe to share or, better yet, call in while you’ve got something in the oven. You wouldn’t be the first to cook during book club (shout out to 👨🏻🍳 Ben Greene …)
xx Kyle
📖 Follow the Reader
Krys' first memoir The Natural Mother of the Child, interwove his diaristic writing with the visual ephemera of pregnancy. I don't know how anyone keeps publishing while feeding four children, but I can't wait to ask.
▶️ Press Play
What got missed by many during the ‘transgender tipping point’ elevation of Laverne Cox to the cover of TIME magazine is that she’s not just a gorgeous, talented actress — Laverne is a studied, strategic, tireless advocate. We all benefit from her care and commitment. (And charisma!) Her new memoir Transcendent is at the top of my TBR pile and she’s at the top of my 2027’s book club vision board… press play on this excellent interview with Design Matters’ Debbie Millman.
📚️🏳️⚧️✨ Being Alive Book Club
Who amongst us doesn't have at least one celebrity chef they channel while sautéing? I want to hear which food celeb you invite into your kitchen, come chop it up with us in the BABC chat thread.
Can’t wait to dig in with Krys Monday July 27 8p ET / 5p PT on Zoom. (RSVP)
All are welcome at the BABC book club. While many people read cover-to-cover, many join for the community, craft, and conversation (even when they haven’t started/finished.)
Hope to see you next week!
“Belc’s writing is thought-provoking, expansive, and original. Delicious.” —Booklist
“Reading [Belc’s] clear-eyed and thoughtful exploration of being primarily responsible for feeding himself, his wife, and their four children is a beautiful reminder of how both elemental and sacred a homemade meal can be.” —VOGUE
Being Alive Book Club is a community effort to amplify trans voices by reading trans authors. Visit the home of Being Alive Book Club for links to all the upcoming books, FAQs, and previous recaps. All but one of this year’s books are available now:
July: What I Made for Dinner with Krys Malcolm Belc
August: The Lilac People with Milo Todd
September: Saint Consequence with Michael M. Weinstein
October: Mad Eden with Morgan Thomas
November: Love in a F*cked-Up World with Dean Spade
December: And If I Die Before I Wake with George M. Johnson
Have a trans author you want to recommend to Being Alive Book Club? Drop me message or comment on this post.